Our Curated Coping Strategies: Dr. Jess

Get to know the doctors of Your Village Journey! This post will feature Dr. Jess and our follow-up will feature Dr. Jenn.

As clinical psychologists, it is crucial and important to us to practice the very same strategies and mindsets that we encourage for our clients, our families, friends and communities. 

My go-to coping strategies have shifted over the course of my life to meet my changing needs and responsibilities. 

Check out how I am currently curating my coping strategies:

Move it Out

• I take a walk around my neighborhood while listening to fun, uplifting music or an outdoor exercise class
• My weekly dance class keeps me centered…literally (stay tuned for an upcoming blog post about my experience returning to dance class as a 30-something)
• Do a few yoga sequences; my go-to is 5 rounds of sun salutations 
• Dance break with my kids! Topping the playlist right now include: anything from the Encanto soundtrack, Shake it Off by Taylor Swift, and Coldplay’s dance tracks

Sing it Out

• Belting out broadway showtunes or 90’s pop (hey to all my millennial readers!) at full volume is an immediate mood booster for me. 
• No matter what kind of music resonates with you, leverage it as part of your coping package. It is a powerful part of community, culture, memory, and emotion and plays an active role in mood regulation (Power of music).

Write it Out

• I jot down the thing I’m struggling with and when I’m ready, I come back to it and write more. Dedicated time, even 15 minutes is enough, to write down an experience or challenge (Scheduled “worry time” technique) can support productive processing and problem solving. Pro Tip: set a time, release judgment, and just write! 

Connect by Voice

• So many of my sources of support are also in very busy stages of their lives with careers and families so when I need support I make a point to reach out with a quick text or call. Even a few minutes of connection really make a difference for me. My go-to face time calls or texts are a few close friends, my two sisters and my mom – and of course, Dr. Jenn!

Connect by Touch

• I pull my family in for a hug whenever I need one. A 20 second hug reduces stress, blood pressure, and strengthens your connection with the person you are hugging (Why hugs matter) 
• I’m also an animal lover and find connection with my 3 rescue kitties very calming; similar to human hugs, cuddling with a pet is not only relaxing but good for our health (The power of pets) 

Back to Basics

• When I’m really short on bandwidth, I take a shower and go to bed early. I say no to or reschedule anything else. It’s amazing what washing my hair and getting 8 hours of sleep can do!

Sensory Comfort

• A soft, comfortable sweatshirt (in my favorite color, purple) a spray of favored perfume (I love Grace by Philosophy), making sure I’m satiated with a nutritious, comforting meal, and curling up with a cozy special blanket is very soothing and grounding. Our senses give feedback to our brains and bodies about stressors and how we are doing managing those stressors; intentionally turning to calming or soothing sensory comforts can immediately reduce the experience of stress. 

Plan and Prepare

• As two working parents, being on the same page with our family schedule is crucial to my coping. At least once per week, we carve out 10-15 minutes to check in about our upcoming schedule which does two things for me: 1) we connect and ensure we share logistics and parenting responsibilities and 2) it gives us an opportunity schedule in our time which might be a date night or a few hours to work on a project together  

Floor Time

• I find this very grounding. When I’m overstimulated, I like to lie down or sit on the floor for a few minutes to re-connect with my body. The floor beneath me reminds me I am supported. This is also a wonderful way to connect with or co-regulate with the kiddos in your life – joining them on their level or inviting them to lie with you on the floor can offer a different sense of connection. 

Zone out TV Break

• Renovation shows in particular are my go-to for TV that really gives my brain a break. Thanks HGTV! Our lives can be so stimulating and busy that sometimes this is exactly what is called for to cope. However, this can be one of those coping strategies that when overused can lead to avoidance, TV binges, and can turn into a UU coping strategy. To keep this strategy HH for you, be sure to set a time limit and be intentional about what you watch! (Check out our previous blog post on UU and HH coping strategies!)

Check it Off

• Checking off a task is empowering. When I’m stressed, it’s often because I’m overwhelmed by the sheer number of tasks on my to-do list. Choosing a “low-hanging fruit” task (something I know I can accomplish within the time I have) boosts my confidence, reduces my stress, and keeps me going.

The Caffeinated Cope

• I savor my daily coffee. I usually make a regular drip coffee at home but sometimes, going out for a fancy coffee drink elevates my day and is exactly what I need to cope. Lavender latte, anyone?

Let us know if any of these strategies resonate for you!

Joy in the Journey, 

J & J